Focused and Caring
there's always hope
Your Life Can Get Better
Therapy is not one-size-fits-all. What makes therapy effective is that the therapist shows up ready to put forward his best self and enables the client to feel safe and open enough to do the same. A therapeutic relationship built on respect and professional care is the first ingredient to a better life.
The second ingredient is proven and powerful solutions. Problems come in all shapes and sizes. That’s why therapeutic training needs to be broad and informed by research and experience.
Everyone has limits
break past your limits
Growth is recognizing limitations in order to move past them to become greater and more whole
Recognize and own all your feelings without being owned by them.
Use your values and dreams as a compass to take your life where you want to.
Transform your feelings and articulate your values into powerful actions for better living.
From Feeling Better to Achieving Greatness
How problems hide meaning
A lot of therapy approaches focus on getting rid of pain. That makes a lot of sense and often does the trick. Any therapist worth his salt needs to look at the basic mechanics of a person’s life to see what’s getting in the way before slapping on a diagnosis. Is that depression or the natural result of being laid off? Is that anxiety or is it how anyone would feel living in a high conflict marriage?
More often than not problems run deeper. Self-soothing, emotion regulation techniques, and marital negotiation skills are vital but only solve half the problem. What often hurts more isn’t the tightness in the chest or the fear of judgement. It’s what these problems keep us from doing.
A life without suffering is important but is still only half a life. The other half is getting in touch with what pain distracts us from. How has pain taken you away from your meaningful job? How does depression trick you into forgetting to snuggle in with your kids for a bedtime story? Why do the shouting matches between you and your spouse take you away from date night?
Good therapy needs to target the symptoms of pain. However, it also has to enable a client to put those problems aside while they are healing to get back into a rich and meaningful life. We don’t live to not suffer. We live to live.
Here for You Every Step Of The Way
Every problem has it’s solution. Rabbi Bender can help you find that solution and put it into action